August 26, 2005

Bruce Willis: Always a Pasting

Off the top of my head:

Die Hard
- beaten up
- falls down stairs
- walks over broken glass with bare feet
- gets shot (shoulder, I seem to recall?)
- near large explosions

Die Hard 2
- falls off 747
- narrowly avoids a plane landing on him
- jumps off mid-air snowmobile
- beaten up a number of times
- ejects from exploding plane

Die Hard 3
- beaten up severely (hurled bodily into metal crate - in this one? In one of the Die Hard films, anyway)
- giant piece of wire stuck in arm
- falls onto boat
- near large explosions
- shot? (Can't remember)

Tears of the Sun
- shot, more than once

Unbreakable
- in a giant train crash
- beaten up (but takes it)

Hostage
- shot (in the leg)

Twelve Monkeys
- shot dead

The Jackal
- shot dead

The Sixth Sense
- shot (SPOILER WARNING!) dead

Armageddon
- on top of epicentre of nuclear explosion

Billy Bathgate
- feet stuck in a tub of cement, thrown into river

Pulp Fiction
- in a boxing match (does well though)
- in a car crash, looks to have broken nose
- large fight with Marcellus Wallace
- brutally restrained by kinky hillbillies

Sin City
- nearly suffers heart attack
- shot in the shoulder
- subsequently shot like a million times
- heals - gets shot in the shoulder again
- shoots himself in the head, dies (presumably)

Someone should add up the number of bullets Bruce Willis characters have taken. I reckon it's a lot. There needs to be a ridiculous statistic about what you could make with the amount of metal expended if you melted it down.

What am I missing?

No comments: