This post now a major motion picture starring Mel Gibson and Julia Roberts

Well, I've been hassled into making another entry. Things are slow on the posting front of late, I'll admit, although I'm not in here 24 hours a day like Tim at the moment, and thus can hardly be expected to keep up with his crazed update rate. James T. asked recently if the cricket season was responsible for slowing me down, and if he wasn't right before, he's probably about to be, now that the World Cup is underway. Much late night watching to follow, (and if I'm not watching it late at night I'm playing it, or was at least last Sunday under floodlights at my brother's flat until 10:45pm, at which point our fun was stamped on rather bewilderingly by the arrival of noise control) although following N.Z's progress through the cup may be a short-lived experience with last night's rather lame performance (with the rather large exception of an outstanding innings by Let's Get Busy Billy Ray Styris) against Sri Lanka. Damn the bad batting and damn terrorism and poor security in Kenya making it pretty damn impossible for us to qualify now for the next round. Unexpected consequences of global terrorist action: upsetting New Zealand cricket fans. Still, if I am to feel any effect from global terrorist action, I suppose this is one of the better ones to end up with.

Perhaps Coke has been taking note of this blog, and I have suceeded in changing the world from the grassroots level, because free 600ml Cokes seem to be abundant in their current N.Z promotion. I'm up to 4 now, including 2 in a row. Still, I feel this is only fair really, and I'm still going to keep an eye on them, because I'm increasingly dubious about such promotions and their total lack of accountability. It all started when I was duped into filling in one of those month-long consumer survey book thingies that is so detailed that you have to fill in what colour the thing you were thinking about at 9:37am on a Tuesday was, all so the powers that be at Capitalism International can try and determine if Heath Ledger is the new Matt Damon. I would have course not have been arsed were it not for the fact that ColmarBruntonGallupHaywardandVoxpop or whoever the hell they were had not promised me a very good chance (and they did) of winning all kinds of goodies like TVs and stereos and holidays when I had filled in their 27,000 page booklet for them. Duly I did (over the course of about a geological era), and eagerly awaited by name amongst the published list of winners which was to appear (I was informed, in writing) in the Sunday Star-Times at such and such a date. Such and such a date then arrived and no such list of winners was printed. Somewhat confused, and a tad miffed at the total absence of me in sunny Fiji, I got in touch with ColmarBruntonGallupHaywardandVoxpop who informed me that "the prize draw had to be cancelled due to circumstances beyond their control", or something along those lines. Hmmmmm.

I note that whenever you enter these competitions for a major prize it always says something like "Winners must consent to have their names used for publicity purposes", but where is this publicity? Where are the announcements in newspapers or on radio or the TV spots? In fact, with the number of these promotions various companies are offering at various times, we could almost expect a special section of the daily newspaper to let us know who has won what this week. Yet we don't hear a lot about it. Which makes me think: do people actually win these prizes at all? Or does Coke or whoever just publish in the Public Notice section of the classifieds in very small writing "the 30,000 dollars was won by Antonius Bayle of Masterton, that is all" knowing full well that this person doesn't exist (or do they?), and that nobody will check that they do? Cue once again the scene of the Coke boardroom, bearing an aesthetic and atmospheric similarity to the scene from Mullholland Drive with the mysterious, all-powerful and extremely ominous Hollywood executive directing the world outside from his corporate lair. "Another fraud successfully perpetrated on the public!" the Lord of Coke cackles, gazing into his palantir. "Soon my plan will near completion!"
OK, so I may be getting carried away here, but seriously, we're a nation of only (nearly) 4 million, and we should have that whole 6 degrees of separation thing going on pretty well, so does anybody know anyone who had a neighbour that had a cousin who had a friend that won one of these things? Or are corporate competitions simply the biggest cover-up since the CIA killed everybody who saw Elvis crash a UFO onto the head of the Loch Ness Monster? Think about it.

In today's "Ramblin' About with Good Ol' Ben" section, subtitled "Things Wot I Did Lately, Guv'nor", Saturday night saw me, Nic, Adam, Andrew, Lis and Heidi attending a party that we had no right to be at. Well, certainly me and Nic and Andrew and Lis probably had no right to be at it. When people asked us who we were, we were forced to reply that we were the friend of the elder brother of the boyfriend of the person who was having the party. Despite this tenuous link we were unsurprisingly not kicked out into the street. Highlights included people being so impressed by the guitar playing of Nic, Adam and Andrew and the accompanying singing of Heidi, Lis and myself (we are getting fairly practiced I suppose) that we were asked if we "did any originals." This resulted in a resounding rendition of the minor classic My Name's Jeff by Adam that saw people who didn't know who he was leaving the party going "See ya, Jeff" which was ridiculously amusing to those of us in the know. Me (to a lesser degree), Adam, Nic and Andrew especially proceded to get really rather drunk, which after several "I love you man! No, I love YOU, man!" type conversations culminated in tired plastered Andrew actually sleep-eating his pizza at the Jolly Poacher on the way home, which was an astounding thing to behold. Astounding also was the fact that we were not kicked out of the place, nice work the less Nazi than usual bouncer and his tolerance of Andrew remaining for all legal puposes asleep even whilst drinking a glass of water. It's been a while since the last "in the JP at 5am scenario" and it was a sterling effort by all involved.

As Teens has already noted, the Maize Maze is cool and should be attempted by all and sundry, as it was by Dan, James, Sara, Teena and myself on Waitangi Day. Athough at times I neared babbling panic wandering through the corn (corn:scary) thinking about Signs and "He Who Walks Behind the Rows", the stern sensibilities of James "Scout Troupe Leader" Caygill ensured morale was kept well up, and I would thoroughly reccommend it to everyone as a good way to spend a sunny afternoon, wandering around having conversations like:

It was right, right?
No, left looks right. Right was right before.
Oh, right. Right-o, left then.

But not a good way to spend a night, lest you surely fall victim to unseen pagan Gods or invading aliens. Obviously.

In other news / summaries, what? Well, congratulations to Lis for being, like Krang, an enormous brain, although one seemingly less bent on world domination. We will demand you send us appropriate super prestigious university merchandise. Also, Arc is forced to reconsider his Raiders of the Lost Ark decision in light of the facts (never did anyone claim it should be in the Top Ten), aha, the worm has turned, will public opinion make reinstatement a possibility? Stay tuned. Well done to Hamish for this February 8 post which made me laugh rather hard, send me a mail when you see Supergrass. Rumblings afoot in the GWA you may have missed recently, watch for upcoming activity. And now it's 6:30 and it's time for dinner.

Entry duely posted. And there was much rejoicing.